Gillian Ward’s "Off season" Training Plan - Recover, Regenerate, Renew, Revitalize...

My very long first season of physique competition has drawn to a close. I have
essentially been on a calorically restricted pre-contest diet since the beginning
of January 2014 (with a few weeks off here and there post contests).

This year I competed in April, May, late August and then 1 November. For most of 2014, I
trained at an energy deficit therefore my strength gains and ability to put on muscle was limited if not non-existent. The focus was on dialed in nutrition and physique refinement.

Two weeks ago, I entered my “off-season” which is really a poor term. If you take anything seriously in life there is no “off-season”. If you are serious about pursuing a goal to the highest extent, consistency is key. To be at your best, perfect attendance is required in both training and nutrition.

As a multi sport athlete for over three decades I have always trained hard year round. I confess though that the concept of dialed in nutrition all of the time is something new to me. This year as a physique competitor I learned just how valuable sound nutrition is to performance and aesthetics. Prior to that I used to operate under the assumption that I was fortunate enough to eat anything that I
wanted and still perform at my best. I was lying to myself. What you put in your body is critical to growth, repair and performance in addition to aesthetics.

I am breaking up my “off season” training plan into two phases. The first one will run from now until the end of 2015 and I will refer to it as Phase 1 - Recover,

Regenerate, Renew, Revitalize (P1R4 ). During this phase I will return to my training roots which is primarily barbell movements (powerlifts & Olympic lifts), gymnastics skills and conditioning. This was the combination that created the physique that I walk around with. The physique that took me from first time physique competitor to stepping onstage as an IFBB Pro in 7 months. I am a firm believer of not fixing something that is not broken. Different is not better. More is not better. Better is better. To me better is performing functional large multi joint movements that require balance, mental focus, coordination and high levels of force to be exerted. Additionally these movements can be measured and quantified with ease and accuracy. It’s simple – this week I added 5lbs to my squat.

These types of variables are far easier to make sense of then figuring out if my triceps have more striations than last week (different lighting, different camera, time of day, hydration and so on).

More importantly, this type of training is gratifying and rewarding to me. As I mentioned above it is all about attendance and consistency. If I find something gratifying and rewarding I am more likely to adhere.

To use an awful cliché analogy I consider my “off-season” to be the building of my tree. It needs to be watered (hydrated) and fed (nutrition) with deep roots (strong core) to withstand the elements (prevent injury). I want it to grow as lush and green and tall as possible (broad, general strength).

Contest season is when my tree gets pruned (calorically restricted diet) and trimmed with pretty ornaments (finishing, shaping movements) for presentation.

If I have a sparse, weak, malnourished tree the ornaments won’t matter.

I will be posting exact details of my P1R4 training phase over the coming weeks on my blog at http://www.gillianwardathlete.com/

10/20/Life + LRB Seminar in January

Brian Carroll and I are doing a seminar at MadTown Fitness in Madison, Wisconsin in January.

Full details are at the below link -

http://store.lift-run-bang.com/seminar-registration/

Don't miss this.  We're going to cover a lot of awesome material.

My mass gaining article at T-Nation

http://www.t-nation.com/training/guaranteed-muscle-mass

Relentless Detroit Recap

I would write here that I did a meet this past weekend, but that really wouldn't give the experience the justice it deserves.

Relentless isn't as much of a powerlifting meet as it is an event, and a phenomenal one to say the very least.  If you aren't aware of what Relentless is, it's a charity that uses powerlifting as the vehicle to bring everyone together to raise money for children with terminal illnesses and the families for those kids.

But it's hard to encapsulate what it's like to be part of it in words really.  It has to be experienced to be understood.  And anyone and everyone involved in it comes away feeling the same way about it.  That it's easily the most uplifting and positive thing going on in powerlifting.  And all of those in powerlifting that aren't involved in it are really missing out on something very special.

So if you're not involved in Relentless Minnesota or Detroit, I urge you to get involved in it for next year and be part of something that is truly the most awesome thing going on in powerlifting.

Doubts..... - 

Anyone that follows LRB probably remembers that I competed at this event last year.  I tore my quad on my second squat attempt.  It was easily the most painful injury I've ever had in lifting, and had it been any other meet, I probably shut it down at that point.  But it's hard to not lift when you understand what you are there for.

I remember thinking at the time that there was no way I wasn't going to finish.  Yes, it's just lifting weights, but that's not the point.  There are kids there fighting for their life, and families that wake up everyday immersed in the stress of those real battles.  They can't just walk off the platform and call it a day, and say "there's always another."  So I wasn't going to either.

But I'd be lying if I said that injury hadn't plagued my thoughts.  In fact, the last three meets I've done I've gotten injured and the criticisms I have heard and read haven't been unwarranted.  That I couldn't get through a meet without getting injured.  Hey, at this point I couldn't argue.  And yeah, that weighed on me.  I'd grown very tired of putting in the time, money, and effort it takes to compete only to walk away injured and disappointed over and over again.

My training wasn't great going into this meet.  The last five weeks of training I had this excruciating pain in my biceps that came on every time I squatted or benched.  I had one bench session in that time where I was able to bench over 405 for reps because of the pain in my arms.  It's NOT elbow related for those that keep offering up advice.  I know how to fix elbow problems.  This is a pain that radiates down through both biceps and is so severe it causes my hands to shake and actually makes me nauseous at times.  I think I am on the verge of figuring out what it is, and will get treatment for it soon.

So my training cycle going into the meet was very hit and miss because of the pain.

Because of the previous injuries and this nagging ache in my arms, I finally made a decision to do something that I wished I had done all the times before I had competed.  And that is, just go in and have fun.  No pressure, no worries about numbers.  Try not to get inured, and just enjoy my time there with friends and the experience that is Relentless.

Helping to make that happen was my buddy, Kevin Smith.  I met Kevin last year at Relentless and he was a guy that, after I suffered my injury, offered up some very encouraging words that really stuck with me that day.  Kevin and his wife Mary offered up their spare room for me to stay in while I was there.  This took a lot of pressure off of the usual travel bit of getting a cab, or a car, then checking in to the hotel, then finding my way to the meet the next day, etc.  Not only that, but I'd get time with someone I consider a good friend, and relax during my time there.

Because it's me, I couldn't get through this process without something bad happening.  The day before the meet I felt completely awful.  My eye was watering and was hurting badly, and overall I felt lethargic and like I needed to lay down all day.  By that evening I knew something was wrong, and asked Kevin if he'd take me to an urgent care clinic to get it looked at.  Normally, I'd just suck it up and deal with it, but I didn't want to go into the meet feeling like shit this time.

Turns out I had an allergy related eye infection in both eyes.  The doc gave me some drops for it, and Kevin, being the sweetheart that he is, put them in for me.  I have never had contacts so putting in eye drops is like fucking impossible for me.  I just blink and blink and blink the whole time, and never actually get them in.  So Kevin was nice enough to handle this for me.

I will say that I did some things differently this time for the meet, and I do believe they helped play a part in me performing better.

For one, I didn't do a weight cut.  This was a huge amount of pressure taken off.  Not only from a feeling miserable standpoint, but from a worrying about injury standpoint.  Some guys do just fine with weight cuts, but I don't appear to be one of those guys.  Instead, I ate UP going into the meet.  I was about 262 or so two weeks out from the meet, and on meet day I weighed in at 271.  I also didn't eat junk, or stuff myself full of processed food.  I simply ate all the clean carbs I wanted.  I personally think that doing the whole "let's get bloated - stuff myself full of processed shit" isn't a great idea.  Even if it gets your bloated and you weigh more, you tend to feel like shit.  My sleep the last week and a half going into the meet was awful so I didn't need to add on something else that was going to make me feel terrible.

The night before the meet, I also felt like my food wasn't digesting very well, and that it was all just sitting right in my stomach.  My arms and legs felt "flat", while my midsection looked like I had swallowed a basketball.  If you ever get this, the remedy is to do a light workout to get some blood moving into those areas.  Which I did earlier in the day.  However it didn't seem to help quite enough.  By chance, I figured out that a long hot shower helps as well.  I took one that night, and within an hour or so, my arms and legs had filled out quite nicely again.  

Meet day - 

The day of the meet, I ate very little that morning.  I used to load up on this big breakfast because you know, I was going to be lifting all day.  But in retrospect I honestly feel like that bogged me down and would make me feel quite lethargic all morning.  All I had this time was one (yes ONE) egg delight from McDonald's and some coffee.

I was in the first flight of squatting, and we were slated to start at 9 a.m.  I LOATHE lifting that early.  So I didn't feel good about that either.  I tend to lift around 11:30 a.m. or noon most days.  Sometimes later.  I know 9 a.m. isn't "early" but it's early for lifting for me.  But that was the line up, so I had to roll with it.

Another thing I did was go back to my own rule of opening really light.  It's a rule I bitch at people about but sort of got away from it myself the last couple of meets.  And well, that's dumb on my part.  Someone once told me in regards to opening light "that's a wasted attempt."  Honestly, that's one of the dumbest things I've ever heard or read about picking attempts.  The only wasted attempt is the one you don't get.  Opening light has a million benefits and virtually no drawbacks.  It allows you judge the lifting environment (platform could be shaky, bench feels weird, etc), and to get the nerves out.

So I opened on squats at a measly 550, and of course crushed that very easily.  However, I did get a bit on my toes so it wasn't as fast as it could have been.  I chose 600 for my second, and apparently it was faster than 550, as when I got to the table to call my third Donnie Thompson goes "you're going 650 right?"  Because I wanted to stay conservative and get out of this meet unscathed, I called for 630 instead.  As I walked off, Brandon Lilly came up to me and goes "You call 650 for your third?"  I told him I was staying conservative, and he said he didn't think that was a bad call, but that my 600 was so fast that he would have called at least 640.


Before I could get down the hallway, another guy asked me if I was going 650 for my third.....at this point I started to wonder if I had made the right call.  But I stuck with it, and came back and squatted the 630 incredibly easy.  So much so that after I watched the video, I knew why everyone was saying to call 650.  660 would have been doable as well.  But, 630 was still a nice little meet PR, and I got all three squats in with no issues.  So I was content.



The only bad part was, my arm pain was back in full force at this point, so I knew benching was going to be rough.

Because the meet was so big, and there were five flights, and an intermission, it was four hours or so before we even started warming up to bench.  That was enough time to let some of the pain die down, but even on warm ups it was agonizing.  I figured that I could still get in my opener of 405, and call it a day of benching if I had to.  My last warm up was 365 and made my biceps feel as if they were going to explode.

A fellow lifter had been dealing with the same issue months before and he and I talked about just getting in the bench opener and if shit felt rough to shut it down.  In my mind, I'm thinking this is a good idea.  However I know me.  And in my head I'm thinking "well, nothing is going to tear, so I might as well just gut it out."

I opened at 405, and for whatever reason, the pain on that one wasn't so bad and smoked it.  This gave me a glimmer of hope that it was possible the powerlifting gods might smile on me for the day and let me get in three good attempts.  I called for 440 on my second.  Somewhere between 405 and 440 I apparently pissed the gods off again because the pain returned full force at 440.  I pressed it easily but the pain took quite a bit out of me.  I called for 450 on my third, as not to make a big jump and just get all three benches in.  The pain on the descent of the third was about a million times worse than the 440 and I was just spent at that point.  It came off my chest very fast but I just couldn't finish.  I was spent at that point.



This was really the only disappointing part of the meet for me.  The way training had gone months earlier I knew I'd be right around 480 or better for the meet.  I had hit 405x7 with all reps paused, with at least another rep in the tank.  So I knew I'd be very close to 500 based on my training numbers.

Still, I wasn't injured and had a 440 on the books for the day.

Luckily, it was another 100 hours before we deadlifted (I literally think it was 12 hours after we first squatted) so once again I had a chance to let the pain subside a bit before we would pull.  Again, warm ups didn't feel great.  I pulled 225, 315, 405, 500, then 585 and planned on opening at 635.  The 585 didn't move in warm ups like I had hoped so I knew I'd just have to wait and see how 635 moved and go from there.

Fortunately, the 635 flew off the floor, and JJ asked me if I was going to actually put some weight on the bar for my deadlifts.  When I got to the table, Donnie asked me "700?".  I said "680."  Donnie rolled his eyes at me.  Why 680?  I figured I could pull an easy 680 and get 1750 on the books for the day, and then take a big jump for my third.  At that point, Brandon called me over and goes "you're going 700 right?"

"680" I said.

"Dude, why?"

I told him my reasoning and Brandon basically told me I had to go 700.  I related him my story earlier about the squat and he said "so you have Donnie Thompson and myself both telling you to go 650, and you ignored it, and now 700.  What are you gonna do?"

I walked back to the table and called 700.

Of course I pulled it.  I honestly had no doubt in my mind.  Regardless of what you have read on the internet or how hard you've stuck to jokes from two years ago because you're an idiot, I've pulled 700+ in the gym several times now.



I probably could have gone 710 with no issue, but getting the 700 actually on the books was fine, and I ended the day with 1770, no belt....no wraps....and most importantly, no injuries.

Most importantly, I did it at an event where it really matters to me.  I came back after a year filled with a lot of doubt and trepidation and put together my best meet to date.  I have no doubt that without my arm pain and well, listening to a few other people I could have gone 660 - 480 - 710.  That's 1850 with no belt, and very respectable in my opinion.

Thanks - 

I have so many people I want to thank.

Most importantly, Tommy Westoff and JJ Thomas for putting this thing together.  I can't imagine the kind of time and effort the put in behind the scenes to make all of this happen.  This event raised 214K dollars for the families in this cause, and while the day is long and grueling, it's really something special to be a part of.  As I noted earlier, if you aren't involved in it, do so.  You won't regret it and you'll walk away with probably the best experience you'll ever have in regards to powerlifting.

Kevin and Mary Smith for being who they are, and the kind of people they are.  To let my sorry ass come and reside in their home for an entire weekend takes a tremendous amount of courage, and taking care of me.

I want to thank Chad Dresden for plotting out his entire day just to hang out.  Chad has become a close friend that I care a lot about and we hadn't seen each other since last year.  So it meant a lot for him to take that time out just to see me.

I also want to thank Andy Grimm, who had a nice day going until he tore his bicep deadlifting.  Andy gave me a lot of mental support as he had been dealing with the same arm pain I had a few months before.  

It was awesome to see so many people I know.  Donnie T, Scott Cartwright, Matt Kroc, Rob Luyando, Jay Ashman, Shawn Frankle, Marshall Johnson, Theresa Foy, Brian Carroll, Dave Douglas, Brandon Lilly, and a ton of others I am sure I forgot.  If I did, I apologize and it's not because you're not important.  There's just so many people to remember.

It was also a pleasure meeting Mark Miller, Shana Ratcliff, Weston Riddle (who had a phenomenal day and has a bright future), Dan Dalenburg (who I had met last year but never talked to) who also had a nice day with a 2K total.

I'm sure I'm missing people left and right and I apologize again if I left anyone out.

I would like to say thank you to everyone that came up and introduced themselves.  That always means a lot to me.  

Last but not least, thanks to the two biggest pieces of shit I know.  Swede and Pegg, who no matter what always have my back, always have an ear to lend, and who I love like the brothers I never had.

Furry, we all missed you a ton.  Get well soon and let's get the gang back together for next year.

You don't lift like me, therefore, you should die

I cringe when I have to start an article with "back in the day."

For a myriad of reasons.

For one, it makes me feel old.  I'll be....well, I have a birthday in a few months and it's one of those significant ones.  And by significant the second number has a zero in it.  And the first number isn't a 2 or 3.  However, it's not a 7 or a 9 either.  Although I will admit if I were turning 90, I'd literally be the sexiest 90 year old that ever walked the face of the Earth.  Maybe I should run with that from now on when someone asks me how old I am.

"Fuckin, ninety!  Not even in a diaper yet!"

Where was I?

Oh yeah....back in the day, and by back in the day I mean back in the 70's, the entire bodybuilding and strength culture and all the various subcultures had a very different look and feel than it has today.  I'm not talking about fashion either.  That shit back then was atrocious.  I don't give a damn what you say or how much you love nostalgia.  There is a reason shit goes out of style, comes back in, and then people go "ok, ok yeah it was stupid."  

I'm talking about the manner of respect, camaraderie, and admiration that each of those groups had for each other.  Bodybuilders did powerlifting.  Powerlifters did bodybuilding training, and all of those guys found that there was something that they all had in common, regardless of the differences that separated them.  Which of course was the love of the barbell; the clanging and bangin (kudos to The Rock for coming up with such an awesome term for lifting) was something they all shared and appreciated in a togetherness kinda way (cue kumbaya).  

Perhaps I'm wrong.  Perhaps it was all a big facade and all of those guys really hated each other, and were fake as hell.

Wait.  No that can't be right, because that would be more like it is today.

And that is....splintered.

In a time where we can share more freely with each other via the net, we've instead found a medium that serves a far better purpose.  To hate the living shit out of each other.

If you don't think so, Google crossfit and see how long it takes you to find a link to an article overflowing with viotrol.

In fact, at this point any anti-Crossfit article just looks like click bait to me, and I'm done with it.  I feel like at this point, the entire lifting culture is straight out the Chapelle player haters ball skit.

"What can be said about Crossfit that hasn't already been said about Afghanistan?"

But you can easily substitute Crossfit for powerlifting, bodybuilding, physique, bikini, mens physique, and strongman.

Find a message board dedicated to each endeavour and it won't take long until you find pages and pages dedicated to tearing people apart both in regards to their performance, and them personally.  Nevermind that 99% of the posting in such places don't really know the people they are talking shit about.  That isn't relevant.  It's the net.  I know you because, well, I read some shit you wrote, and disagreed.  And "I disagree" just isn't enough to get attention anymore.  No, that's very sophomoric.

"I hate that fucking asshole so much.  And I hope he gets torn limb from limb by a hippo that has gone crazy from hepatitis Z, but doesn't actually die from it.  He gets saved by some African tribe that manages to sew his arms to his ass....you know, so he can finally find it because he's so fucking stupid, and that they shove his penis in his mouth and glue his lips shut with poison dart frog secretion."

Of course, the venom spewed like that was over a comment laden with vileness, such as.....

"I thought your squat was a little high on that third attempt."

Such a comment cannot be tolerated, and must be met with enough hatred that would make Pol Pot back away saying...."God damn, son!"  

For a culture that is supposedly filled with a bunch of strong and capable people, I see a lot of hatred over a lot of nonsense.  Admittedly, I used to be game to this.  But that's been quite a while ago, and I publicly want no part of slamming people like that.  It literally serves no purpose.

But I don't think this just an American thing either.

When I was hanging with Dmitry he said that over in Russia there is a lot of discord between Oly guys, bodybuilders, and powerlifters.  That they don't associate with each other, and don't have a lot of love for each other.

"I don't know why.  We all do similar things.  You know?  We pick up weights.  It's good."

Yeah, Klokov basically said "I pick things up and put them down.  So do you.  So it's all good."

Perceptions gone wrong - 

I remember when I used to see this dude doing deadlifts on his videos, and then acting completely ridiculous for every set, and carrying on like a complete assclown.  At the time, I thought he was stupid for carrying on over something as trivial as deadlifting.  I would still watch his videos and say to myself "this dude is so stupid."

Reality?

Today, I love Pete Rubish like a little brother.

What's the lesson learned there?  Your perceptions of someone on the net could be very wrong.  Your perceptions of someone based on what they lift, how they lift, and/or what they write may not be indicative of the kind of person they are, or aren't.

To used a tired and old cliche, lifting is something we do; not who we are.  That is, unless we decide to make lifting "who we are".  But I honestly believe that's rarely the truth.  

But most of us do this anyway.  We love or hate people based on perceptions that may not be reality.  And from top to bottom, what we see is a barrage of insults hurled at every facet of lifting.

If a chick does bikini, she's an idiot.  Doesn't know how to train.

Mens physique competitors have no legs.  Apparently they all served alongside Lt. Dan in The Nam and fell to a similar fate that he did.

Powerlifters are fat.

Bodybuilders are weak and narcissistic.

This woman is too manly.

That dude is too weak to talk about training and has never totalled X amount.

Show me someone that lifts, and I will show you a million people on the net read to tear them down.

Show me a facet of lifting, and I will show you a whole group ready to tear it to bits.

It's like we're all in prison ready to kill each other, and everyone in the free world is looking in from the outside going "ewwww, it sucks in there.  Remind me never to do that....lifting thing."

Judgement is inescapable in this world.  That's a harsh reality of life.  And the net gives everyone who is on it a medium to judge, and judge unfairly if they choose to.

Now let me be clear, I'm not advocating we all participate in sucking each other's e-dicks all the time. It's not that at all.  I just don't get the personal bullshit I see going on all the time now.

People should be open to criticism, but they should also be able to HANDLE criticism appropriately even if they deem it to be unfair.  Let me give everyone a piece of advice here.  If you put up a video on the net, you absolutely should not expect that everyone is going to love it, and tell you what a beast you are, and how hardcore you are, and that you had "9 more in you" when that last rep was a grinder.  

There may indeed be criticism.  I know, such is life.  It's awful.  I don't even say that sarcastically.  I think I get a lot of unfair criticism fairly often.  It's up to me what I decide to do with that.  You know why?  Because that's all that I have control over.  So long as I write, lift, and/or make a video I have to acknowledge that there may be criticism associated with it.  Even unfair, inappropriate, and unfounded criticisms.  But hey, you gotta take the hate with the great.  

More important than that though, is that I don't understand why as a whole, the lifting community can't just say "cool, that person is lifting."  Isn't that AT LEAST something?  I suppose it's not.  I see this same human behavior regardless of what the association is.

"You're not a Christian!  You don't worship Christ like I do!"

Sad, but true.

Maybe it's in our DNA to argue incessantly over nonsense.  But isn't that what dating is for?

I just think it'd be cool if we could all just go "hey....they lift.  Awesome."


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A Meathead's thoughts about life, crap, relationships, and stuff is available

Well.........it's time.  

A meathead's thoughts about life, crap, relationships, and stuff is ready.  

This is a collection of random musings, articles, blog posts, and status' about shit I've written over the years.  This was something I worked on for a long time, and even hesitated to do.  However, because I wrote so much stuff related to non-lifting ideas, problems, circumstances, and the such, I figured it would be cool to throw together a sort of memoirs about this stuff.  

I also didn't want to get pigeon holed as a guy that ONLY wrote about training.  Even in my training books I often wrote about the parallels between lifting and life, and tried to expound on that in so many of my articles.  

Well, here it is.  I won't lie.  I always get nervous and have to prepare myself before I release a book.  It's nerve wracking for some reason.  But if it were easy, anyone would do it.  Or at least, that's what people say before you do shit that makes you nervous.

I want to thank Jen Iron as always for doing a great job on the graphics work.  

I also want to thank so many of you who urged me to do this.  Without your support and encouragement it doesn't happen.  Every time I doubted doing this, or quit on it for a while, somehow I'd end up getting messages from people asking me when it would be ready.  So I want to publically say thank you to everyone who did that.  It really meant a lot to me.  

I also wanted to do this for my girls.  When I am no longer around I wanted them to be able to look back through this and know how much they mean to me.  And maybe understand a few lessons that maybe we never got a chance to talk about much.  Or at minimum, feel like there was a part of me in those words and in those articles that was a reflection of who I was or who I am, at various times in my life.  Maybe some of the words in there would help them through a difficult time when I was no longer around to be an ear for them.  

It took a LOT of work sorting through what I wanted to put in there, and what I would discard.  Imagine 4+ years of articles, posts, status', and other things I've written but never posted anywhere.  Yeah, that took a while.  

I don't expect everyone to agree with what is in this book.  I take some hard stances on things I have strong beliefs in.  Like being a father, and being responsible for your actions and the outcomes they present you with.  Some topics related to that are going to piss some people off.  But I've been known for that a time or two.  I expect criticism for these stances because anytime you stand for something you believe in, there will be people that hate you for doing so. 

I'm fine with this.  

I should have paperbacks in it at some point.  Don't ask when.  I don't know.  It will be on kindle in a few weeks as well.  I wasn't going to do this in ebook at all but I had a lot of people ask for it early, so I will...for now.  After it hits kindle I will probably pull it as an ebook.  The market is so god damn flooded with people writing ebooks that I want to get away from it.  Going paperback is far more legit.  

So without further ado..................

http://www.e-junkie.com/263269/product/501385.php

Why "functional" isn't functional at all in the PT world

Years ago, when I first started writing this blog, it was initially called "functional strength".

That's right.  I named it that.

Why in the world would I name it that, when the industry is filled with a word that has been bastardized to death, and doesn't really mean what you think it means?

Easy.  Because I wanted to redefine it.

However, I came to the conclusion that, despite any effort on my part, nothing would change.

The word functional has been thrown around so long in the personal training word that it has a meaning that can't be changed.

Functional, in the personal training industry, is often associated with combining strength and balance used in a simultaneous manner, i.e. standing on something wobbly while you do a strength training movement.

Because this term has already been thoroughly cemented, the task to overthrow it or redefine it would be absolutely futile in effort.  And the worst part about all of that is, it's never going to go away.  At least not anytime in the near future.

For some reason, years ago when bosu and swiss balls became popular, people started doing exercises on them and when they asked "why?", I suppose the answer from the trainer was "because it's more functional."

I suppose their thinking was, you just never know when you're going to need to balance yourself on a wobbly object at the supermarket while trying to snatch that last box of Reece's peanut butter cup cereal off the top shelf.  Without training for that task, you'd be limited only to the cereals right there in front of your face, like Grape Nuts and Oat Bran.

Plus, all grocery stores require you to stand on a basketball to get shit off the top shelf.  It's a mandatory test of your functional strength for real world application.  You must EARN the Fruit Loops.

Because you need this in your life, Alice.

In all seriousness, I just defined what function strength was several times over.

The ability to demonstrate or apply strength in a real world application/situation.

That's it.  Nothing more.

If you couldn't do something, then got stronger and could do it, then the strength was indeed functional.

So the next question is, how much functional strength does one need?

And the answer is, "however much it takes to accomplish the task."

If you do often find yourself standing on wobbly objects as you try to navigate through life, then yes, by all means stand on wobbly shit in the gym and do strength training movements.

My guess is, you probably don't find yourself in such a precarious situation very often.  I can't tell you the last time, in a real life situation, that I had to stand on a wobbly surface and do something that required a significant amount of strength.  In fact, if such a situation existed I would probably say "doing it that way doesn't seem safe.  Let's fix that wobbly surface so the rest of the job can be completed.  I really need that box of peanut butter cup cereal and I don't feel the need to balance on that basketball to get it."

So what movements are truly functional?

That all depends on what you are using them for, and why.

It seems like, to me, that there exists two extreme camps in regards to this question.

Camp 1 = "a combination of balance and strength"

Camp 2 = "only shit like squats and overhead pressing"

To me, the logical group is the one that says "any movement that allows you to perform real life tasks in and easier or more efficient manner."

This could mean that a myriad of movements fall into the realm of "functional movements."  Even movements detested by a great majority of those in the strength training world.  You know, like leg pressing or even....GASP....the smith machine.

If an elderly person needs more leg strength to make living life easier, i.e. climbing stairs or going on walks to improve overall health, and the leg press accomplished that task then the leg press served a functional purpose.  There's literally no getting around that fact.  The problem with the "hardcore strength community" is that they beat their chest so dogmatically hard that everything has to be about squats, deadlifts, and overhead pressing.  Then often ignoring that not everyone is trying to get as strong as humanly possible with a barbell.  There's a lot of people out there that need more functional strength just to perform mundane tasks without straining or aching to do so.  They probably don't need a 600 pound squat in order to do that.  Just more strength than they currently have.

For some people, the barbell squat or deadlift may even be bad choices to accomplish having more functional strength.  There are plenty of people whose job it is to help the elderly or people with physically disabilities that would never choose the barbell squat or deadlift as a viable option to increase their functional strength.  I know it's alien concept for some, but there are people out there that have short comings that may not allow for doing such movements.  In those cases, the squat or deadlift do not represent the ability to increase functional strength in an optimal manner.

However, I also have trouble finding a purpose for squatting while standing on top of a swiss ball.  Maybe if the circus starts implementing that in their gigs I could see that as a reason for someone looking for work that is really good at that shit.  Outside of that, I'm really struggling with finding the reasons for it.

I think we will always have trainers that ask their clients to do shit standing on one leg while while balancing the top of a toilet on their head while doing a rotator cuff movement because, well, it seems complicated.  And lots of people do in fact believe that the more complicated training appears, the more effective it has to be!  Confusing people seems to be very effective in the training industry.  If it's confusing, it works.  When the reality is, a great coach can take a very complicated thing, and make it seem very simple.  Both in application AND understanding.

Don't get sucked into the thinking that complex means better.  When in doubt, simply apply Occam's razor.  The simplest solution is most often the correct one.